Sure confidence is good. In fact, confidence is GREAT when it comes to doing well with women (or in just enjoying life in general). If you asked a woman, “What are the top 5 personal qualities you want in a man?” …you will be sure to hear “Confidence” as one of the top 5.

Confidence is an expression of self-validation, independence, manhood, and it’s just plain sexy to women.

But even the most confident man in the world needs more than confidence. It’s like making a pizza. The dough (or confidence in this case) is the backbone of the meal, but the other ingredients are essential before you can have a tasty pizza.

So what are the other “ingredients” that make up a Romantic Hero in addition to Confidence?

Lifestyle.

Social/Romantic Skills.

Beliefs about what is truly possible.

Briefly:

Lifestyle – It’s important to have  a lifestyle that is appealing to women. It doesn’t mean you have to be “the most interesting man in the world” (and even that wouldn’t be the “golden ticket” to success with women). It doesn’t mean you have to be rich, good-looking, and/or famous. It doesn’t mean you have to be “connected” or live a life of adventure or be in a band. It simply means you have to have a life that the woman can see herself fitting into well.

Social/Romantic Awareness – It is CRUCIAL to know the psychology of women, but it doesn’t mean you have to be Freud. You’ve got to be socially aware, conversationally acute, and romantically relevant, but it doesn’t mean you have to be Don Juan DeMarco. It simply means developing yourself into a socially and romantically aware person. Think about it. You weren’t born knowing it’s polite and socially expected to say “please” and “thank you”, but you LEARNED those social skills. And you can learn other social (and romantic) skills.

Beliefs – What is truly possible? What REALLY gets a woman attracted and in love with a man? Can you really go from dating zero to romantic hero? Or is that just a cute rhyme some guy made up? If you are reading this post, it’s likely you know (or are hoping) that you can become an attractive man that beautiful, intelligent, and self-confident women enjoy. And you can.

It takes Confidence to tie all of those qualities together. If you lack in one of those 4 essential areas (we all do) then start developing those qualities.

Have questions on how to get those qualities? Email me: MAIL [at] THEROMANTICHERO [dot] COM

The following 30 second experiment will illustrate something powerful:

Try smiling for 30 seconds–a full, REAL smile–and then try and feel bad while you’re smiling. I bet you can’t do it.

Scientists have proved that smiling can actually trick the brain into being happy. You have always known that a smile is indication of pleasure in the brain–and now you know the reverse of that–that forcing yourself to smile will make your brain feel good.

By the way, this is a fun demonstration to show a girl of your fancy. Just make sure to keep the mood light and fun as if it were a game–not serious and professional like a science experiment.

The point of this 30 second game/experiment was to show you that you control your emotional state. If you are happy, it’s your choosing. If you’re sad, it’s also you’re choosing.

How does this connect to dating success with women?

Women are emotional creatures – far more emotional than men. Trying to logically convince a woman (or subtly manipulate her) to fall in love by buying dinner, gifts, and flowers is what a logical man would think works. But it doesn’t work because women are emotional creatures.

Perhaps the most powerful emotion is ATTRACTION. And getting a woman to feel the emotion of attraction is not hard. If you can make her smile, you can make her feel good. If you can make her feel aroused while smiling, you can make her feel deep attraction.

Did you know that if you are feeling an emotion very strongly, others that are near you will feel that emotion?

The way to a woman’s heart is through her emotions. Women generally have a weaker reality – meaning they are more easily influenced than men are. If you have a very strong emotional state, you can get a woman to feel that emotion, and attach those good feelings to you.

So start feeling fun, happy and positive and women will start to notice, and then they will attach those feelings to you.

Imagine being a high status Christian man that beautiful women want to date. If you have considered what it’s like to date amazing women, then it’s likely you are willing to work hard to earn that beautiful girl. What’s the worst that can happen from you trying to become a Romantic Hero?

It’s likely, if you are a Christian man that REALLY wants to become better at dating beautiful women, that you will try very hard. Anyone that has accomplished anything significant in life, knows that it came from hard work and focus.

I didn’t get an A+ on my third grade spelling test because I was naturally good at remembering how to spell words. I didn’t have the best batting average on my high school baseball team because I was blessed with amazing talent. I didn’t become a Romantic Hero after not dating a single girl in high school and college because I all-of-a-sudden became handsome, rich, and famous.

I achieved all of my goals because I worked hard. I was dedicated and focused. I didn’t let anything distract me. I didn’t make excuses for why I couldn’t or shouldn’t succeed. I sought out the necessary information and took action. (In case you were wondering, there are loads of “necessary information” pieces on this blog and you can always email me if you have questions.)

If you make it a goal to become better with women… your life will only get better.

Sure, there will be some moments that sting… but those moments turn into funny stories that you tell your friends and girlfriends.

I’m reminded of a moment where numerous gorgeous women were being entertained and enchanted by me at a house party. I felt like I could ask anyone of them to be my girlfriend right then and there, and the lucky girl would swoon and say “yes” with enthusiasm and passionate fervor.

And then I ran into a sliding glass door in front of all of them. I hit my head on the door so hard it shook the whole house. The girls’ laughed. And laughed. And laughed. And laughed more. And pointed fingers at me. And then laughed some more. I was so embarrassed and defeated that I went home shortly after.

But guess what? I use that story to connect with people and we always have a good laugh over it. Surprisingly, embarrassing moments actually bring people closer together because everyone has had their fair share. Everyone can relate and laugh about an embarrassing moment that they have had.

So if that is the worst that happened to me in my quest to become better at dating women, what’s the worst that you think can happen to you?

Oh, and by the way… the GOOD that happens to you FAR outweighs the bad. I have met, dated, and experienced more amazing women by simply just being more inquisitive and social. When I started working on my social skill-set, learning women’s psychology, and becoming more romantically interesting, my dating life improved tenfold.

I used to be fearful and annoyed by social interactions. Now I thrive and enjoy them.

I used to wish I had an amazing, beautiful, high quality women to call my own. Now I do.

So what’s the worst that can happen if you try to become a high quality Christian man? What’s the worst that can happen if you strive to become a Romantic Hero?  …well, you MIGHT get a few embarrassing stories.

But what is the BEST that can happen if you try to become a high quality Christian man? What’s the BEST that can happen if you make efforts to become a Romantic Hero? …well, you might just become one… and you’ll end up with the woman of your dreams.

The points here:

1. Work hard and be focused on your goal. Nothing of significance ever came about by being lazy.

2. Enjoy the embarrassing moments because there are only a few that will happen and they are truly memorable moments that will serve as stories to connect and laugh with others.

3. Realize the benefits of your efforts and keep those benefits in mind as they are your motivation for hard work. Trust me. The benefits are AMAZING when you become a Romantic Hero.

So in reality, the worst that can happen if you try to become a Romantic Hero is you will become better at socializing, and enchanting and dating beautiful women. Who wouldn’t want that?

Questions? Comments? Email me: mail@theromantichero.com

Cheers,

Mark

Quick, list 3 things that you want in a woman – and it can’t be physical things. (It’s better if you use words and traits that are more specific and descriptive than “nice” and “friendly”.) Were you able to quickly list 3 things? Are you certain that they are personal to you and not just something you regurgitated because someone told you so?

Your dates will be more meaningful and your interactions with women will have more substance if you know what you want.

Every romantic hero has his own personal list of criteria that his woman must have. This ranges from personality traits like being adventurous and reliable, to lifestyle indicators like having a full-time job or being involved in church.

Why is it necessary to know what you want in a woman? Because you can’t have your dream woman if you don’t know who she is! (duh.)

Some things are lifestyle deal breakers. For me, I will only consider a woman if she is physically active outside. She must enjoy nature and she must enjoy hiking or trouncing around in the great outdoors. She doesn’t have to be a “mountain woman” or triathelon contender, but she must have her own desire to be outside and enjoy a little physical activity. Things like bike riding at a park or walking on a beach are good indicators. A girl that is afraid to sweat is a girl that I am not interested in. What kind of lifestyle indicators are you looking for in a woman?

Some things are physical deal breakers. I will only accept a woman who is physically healthy. A woman with poor eating habits and no exercise routines is a woman that I am not interested in. Also, beauty is a must. She has to be physically attractive to me personally. That means I use my own standards for beauty and attractiveness. She could be the most popular supermodel on earth, but just because millions of other men find her attractive does not automatically mean I will find her attractive. What do you personally find physically attractive in a woman? What is your idea of beauty?

Some things are personality deal breakers. She might be drop-dead gorgeous and love to engage nature (meets my two criteria mentioned above), but if her personality is bland and boring, then she is not a girl for me. In addition to being physically attractive and living a lifestyle that I find acceptable, my ideal woman is excitable, adventurous, energetic and quirky. What personality traits do you look for in a woman?

Most men are satisfied to have a gorgeous woman – they are so disillusioned by her beauty that they overlook EVERYTHING ELSE. Beauty and physical attractiveness are only one item on the checklist. The romantic hero has multiple things he screens for.

Guess what? Women are looking to qualify you… Does he have a career? Is he cute? Does he love his mom? What do his shoes look like? Does he take care of himself? (hygiene)  …these are some things that some women screen for. They have their own checklists and you should too.

Next time you are interacting with a beautiful woman, screen her for some of the qualities that you want in a woman. If she qualifies on looks, move on to the next category. Does she have a personality that you enjoy? Lifestyle?

You will only find your dream woman if you know what she looks like, what she does, and how she behaves.

Got a question? Email me: mail@theromantichero.com

Cheers,

Mark

So you’ve read 7 Dating Tips and understand that body language is the #1 way a woman communicates. But do you understand what her body language is telling you? I’m going to reveal a few tips for you to pick up on next time you’re interacting with a potential romantic interest.

1. HIPS – This is THE BIGGEST factor when interpreting a woman’s body language. If her hips are facing you, it is a good thing. Women generally are not aware of it when they do it, but if you are so interesting, compelling, or attractive that her hips are facing you – good job.

There are a number of things that go into whether or not she is feeling attraction for you, but this is the biggest indicator – short of her planting a kiss If her hips are not facing you in an interaction, then you can interpret that as her saying, “I’m not giving you my full attention because you are not interesting, compelling, or attractive enough for me to care.”

2. EYE CONTACT – If her eyes are intently focused on yours, then she is showing interest. If her eyes are wandering or have a blank look, then you can be doing better. If her pupils are dilated, good job, she is feeling a positive emotion with you.

3. PREENING – If she does anything to make her appearance more flattering, then she is feeling something positive towards you. For example, it could be as subtle as a scratch on her wrist or as obvious as a flick of the hair. If she flattens her shirt (to make her tummy appear flatter) or adjusts any clothing, then she is making an attempt to improve her appearance – this means she is trying to look better for you. Again, this is usually something women are not aware of when they do it.

4. TOUCHING – This one seems obvious, but I didn’t know it until someone told me. She might just innocently glance her hand with yours, or do something obvious like hug you. Other indicators are: an elongated touch (something that isn’t necessary such as a prolonged hug, handshake, etc.), touching your arm or shoulder when she says something positive, or even punching you if you tease her (that’s called flirting).

5. FEET – This one is similar to HIPS. Let’s say you are in a group of 5 or so people and someone besides you or her is talking. It would be socially awkward for her to be facing you (with her hips) and listening to someone else who is standing in a different direction than you. So subconsciously, she will point her feet at you if she is attracted. This is especially noticeable when she is seated. You know how women do that crossed leg thing, where one leg is crossed over the other when they sit? Well if the woman is pointing the crossed foot towards you, then that is a positive sign.

While none of these body language indicators are certain signs that a woman is attracted to you, they ARE INDICATORS THAT SHE IS COMFORTABLE – she is open and enjoying your presence. A woman will not point her hips towards you, give you strong eye contact, preen herself, etc. if she is uncomfortable with your presence.

*Here’s a tip for picking up on when she is feeling uncomfortable: when her arms are crossed or in her pockets it means she is closed-off, upset, or uncomfortable with the interaction. (It could just mean she is cold and trying to keep warm so use your critical thinking skills to figure that out.)

Remember that these ‘tips’ are only guidelines and not commandments. They are not always true and definite, but generally you will notice a truth behind what I said.

Really pay attention to these things. The romantic hero is an expert at interpreting a woman’s body language. When you understand these subtle ways women communicate, you can do the same things and have a “between the lines” conversation that few men are able to do with women. It will seriously set you apart from the average guys.

Questions or comments? Email me: mail@theromantichero.com

Cheers,

Mark

Women are all the same because they:

- want a man with confidence

- are social and emotional human beings

- want to love and be loved

- want to feel like a woman

- respond to a dominant man

- enjoy humor

Women are all unique and different because:

- of everything else not mentioned above

The point is, some traits are universally attractive to women. Cultivate and develop your own confidence, social awareness, emotional availability, love, masculinity, dominance, and humor.

The following is a list of traits that beautiful Christian women want in their man. The Romantic Hero constantly works to improve because he knows the best version of himself  is:

A Leader: He is not afraid to make decisions and stick to them.
Purposeful: He lives life on purpose and he has figured out how to best glorify God in his life. His spiritual life is handled.
Enthusiastic: He enjoys fun and adventure.
Ambitious: He wants more in life than just “luke warm”.
Honorable: He has values, beliefs, principles and morals.
Balanced: He is a masculine blend of Heart and Spine.
Dominant: He is assertive and respects himself as much as others. His social skills are excellent and he is socially aware.
Confident: He is fulfilled in the Lord and lives life at God’s edge.
Healthy: He takes care of his mind and body.
Intelligent: He is smart, clever and values critical thinking.
Considerate: He cares for those around him.
Positive: He appreciates and is grateful for a life with God and expresses that in his daily attitude.

Integrate these traits into your personality and YOU WILL BECOME MORE ATTRACTIVE.

If you knew the most important decision of your life was soon approaching, what would you do?

If I said, “(Insert your name here), in two years, you are going to execute the most important decision of your life. It will effect the rest of your life like no other decision you have ever made. Every detail of your life will be directly influenced by this one decision. Are you ready to make that decision?”

You would probably learn everything you could with meticulous research, committed rehearsal, and a determination to make the decision the best possible choice ever. If you really internalized and believed that this was the most important choice you would ever make… it would probably take a long time before you were ready to “pull the trigger” on that decision.

If you haven’t already figured it out, the most important decision a Christian will ever make in his life is choosing his wife.

YOUR WIFE

With divorce rates as high as they are, it would lead one to believe that men are choosing their wives like they choose a fast food meal at lunch – with no regard for the future.

Most men have no knowledge of relationship skills, leaderships skills, social skills, or an awareness of what women want. Why not? Those are exactly what “tools” you need to find a high quality Christian woman and keep her in a healthy and stable relationship.

Your wife is the most important decision you will ever make, and what have you done to prepare?

Don’t tell me you believe in the myth that “one day it will just happen” or “God will put a woman in my life when He thinks I’m ready.”

God has already put thousands of women in your life (unless you live in a rural town) and what have you done so far?

I used to be in denial and believe that “fate” would take care of finding me a beautiful, high self-esteem Christian queen. Boy was I wrong.

Before I learned the social skills, confidence, and charisma of a romantic hero, and after a terrible break up with my girlfriend, I realized I was not the man God intended me to be. I realized that “finding the one” takes effort just as anything else in life.

After that break up, I realized that I had not been preparing myself for the most important decision of my life. Then I made the second most important decision of my life. I chose to do something about it. I chose to get my dating and social life handled. After years of hard work, I became the man of my woman’s dreams. I am her romantic hero.

I spent years studying social dynamics, the psychology of men and women, leadership, and other relevant knowledge that gave me the tools to be a romantic hero for the woman of my dreams. It was hard work and admittedly painful at times. But what success have you ever achieved without putting in hard work?

I studied instructional design (how people learn and how to effectively teach them) in recent years so that I could most effectively teach others what I had learned. I believe romantic and social skills are essential to every Christian man. I believe that every Christian man should be prepared for the most important decision of his life.

“He who finds a wife finds a good thing and receives favor from the Lord.” Proverbs 18:22

“Find” is an active verb. You must go seek your wife. And you must prepare to be your absolute best self when you find her.

In addition to helping you become the romantic hero, this website is here to help you become more social so you can get your dating life handled. I want to help you become the best possible version of yourself – the version that God wants you to be. If you have any questions, email me: info@theromantichero.com

Cheers,

Mark

This article is the expected follow up to One Thing Never to do Around a Woman.

There are two reasons for this follow up article:

1. To show you how to be more challenging in your social interactions and dates. A challenging man is more interesting, fun and attractive to high quality beautiful women. High caliber Christian women are bored with average guys and their average ways.

2. To explain how not to be an overcompensating jerk or annoying pest. Trying too hard will kill any chemistry you have or could potentially have.

Let’s start with the good stuff first.

1. So you want to be more challenging in your social interactions – particularly with a woman you are romantically interested in – but you don’t know how.

Try being more interesting, playful, fun and challenging. Create a positive vibe that makes interactions fun. It’s kind of like you’re playing with your little sister or cousin – but you are adults.

So you don’t actually treat the woman like a child, but the dynamic is “I’m the older brother that is teasing and playing with you. I care about you so I don’t want to hurt your feelings, but I’m not afraid to poke fun or joke around with you.” That is an excellent way to frame an interaction with a woman.

For example, let’s say you are at a social gathering. It could be a birthday party, church mixer, or whatever. You find yourself in conversation with an attractive young lady and you’d like to know if there is more to her than her pretty face. You go through some introductions about who you know, or why you’re there, and then…

Her: “So what do you do?”

She is showing interest farther than just  a superficial level and is asking for you to add input into the conversation. It may be a sign that she is being polite, has social awareness, is being friendly, or might even have an interest in getting to know you more. For now, we’ll just presume she is being polite and friendly.

You: “I’m an agent for Acme Car Insurance. How about you?”

Her: “I’m a teacher.”

You: “Oh, that’s so cool. I commend you for that. Do you like it?”

Her: “Oh, thanks. Yeah, I love it. I’m glad I got into teaching.”

You are not the first man in the universe that she has asked “what do you do?” but you definitely are just another average guy if you reply in an average manner like that. Average equals lame and boring. You don’t stand out, and you didn’t do anything to be challenging, interesting, or fun.

Here is what you could have done:

Her: “So what do you do?”

You: “Well, I come to the rescue of bad drivers. In fact, I think I’ve seen your file a few times, you have a lot of reckless driving tickets, don’t you.”

You tease her a little, but she laughs because you are obviously just joking and trying to have a fun, light conversation at this social function. You don’t directly answer her question and you indirectly ask her to “play your game”. Now if she responds in any way that is positive, that means she is down to play your “game”.

Her: “Haha! What!? No way! I’m such a good driver! Are you a cop?”

Her response is positive. She is having way more fun already than the boring conversation she usually has with every average guy.

You: “Whoa. Do I look like I like a disciplinarian? No way. Try again.”

You are being fun again. Lot’s of playful tonality and smiling so she knows you are being light hearted.

Her: “Haha. Ummm, are you a lawyer?”

She is playing along. Interested to keep the conversation going, and having fun. You have presented two challenges to her by basically saying, “Guess what I do.” If you continue to make her guess, it might get annoying or come off as jerk-ish.

You: “Whoa, whoa. First I look like I’m a disciplinarian, and now I look like an arguer? Man your mean! I’m a car insurance agent for Acme. How about you? You must be a judge or something considering you guessed I was a lawyer and cop.”

Again, you must communicate that you are being light hearted and fun by smiling and keeping high energy. The entire dynamic of the conversation changes based on just a little challenging comment or two. She had fun, she is interested, and you instantly stand apart from every other average guy.

The idea is to put up a little resistance to her inquiries, requests, etc. not to completely avoid or ignore them. That’s just annoying. Which brings us to the second point.

2. Challenging does not mean to be an overcompensating jerk or annoying pest. No woman will become romantically interested in you if you are challenging just for the sake of being challenging.

The point of putting up a little resistance is to make her work to earn your involvement. Beautiful women are always getting what they want. By teasing, joking, and generally just treating her like a guy-friend, you are doing something that she doesn’t experience with the majority of guys she interacts with.

But don’t take it too far – for example if a man were to take our conversation, and do this:

Her: “What do you do?”

Man: “I’m a butt model.”

Her: “Haha! Yeah, I can tell. Really, though. What do you do?”

Man: “I’m actually head french fry chef at McDonalds”

Her: “Haha. Okay, Mr. Jokester. But really…”

Man: “I’m a secret agent for the CIA”

Her: “Okay…”

At first, the funny “butt model” joke was challenging and the man set himself apart. But going too far is just annoying. The woman is showing genuine interest and wants to know more about the man, and he just keeps being challenging… too challenging. In fact, it’s jerk-ish behavior.

The idea of being challenging is to put up a little “wall” to her questions, requests, etc. by not immediately answering her question, or not quickly fulfilling a request… but the “wall” is not a permanent barrier… if she pushes back, then the wall should fall down and she should win your attention.

So don’t be a jerk or pest by being overly challenging. The Romantic Hero is a smooth blend of heart and spine. He isn’t a macho jerk, nor a wimpy nice guy. He is a challenging and interesting combination of each extreme.

There are many things men should not do around a woman. I’m sure you can think of a few. I bet if you and I were to compile a list of “Top Ten Things Men Should Not Do Around Women”, our lists would share many of the same things. (Flatulence is the first thing that comes to my mind. hehe)

However, many men would not include neediness in their list – yet this is perhaps the most important quality to not exhibit to a woman. Many men do not understand the concept of neediness or are not aware that they are being needy. This is most apparent in the small group of men I teach.

MY ROLE

My personal leadership role in my church involves teaching a small group of single men how to become the romantic hero for the woman of their dreams – that’s where I got the idea to create this website. Having worked with men live and in person, I noticed the horrific projection of neediness that men exhibit when they are not aware of how to be a romantic hero. It’s something that I did in the past, and something I took active steps to overcome. I recently introduced the concept of neediness to our small circle of students.

NEEDINESS

Our group has been focusing on the different ways men can internalize and express the concept of not being needy.  Our goal was to really understand that women are absolutely annoyed and disgusted by a needy man. Ask several single attractive women what they think about dating a man who is needy. It is likely the women will respond with an scrunched up face and say, “Gross!” or something along those lines.

Neediness ruins any chance a man has at becoming a romantic hero and women can sense neediness from a mile away. This is a monumentally important concept that affects every single man’s chances of finding a quality wife.

The audio track below is an example of what will NOT get the woman of your dreams attracted to you. If you have done something like this in the past, forgive yourself and move on. You NEVER want to do what this guy did.

If it isn’t obvious, this man is needy – and way too creepy. While most men won’t go to this extent to get a woman’s attention, they do give off similar vibes that a woman can sense. Neediness is largely the reason why attractive high quality women reject average guys. Most guys are projecting neediness even if they are completely secure and not needy! Later in this article and in future posts you will learn how to not give off needy signals – even if you are needy.

Recently, instead of teaching our group how NOT to display neediness to potential romantic interests (like leaving creepy voicemail), I focused on a trait that implies the exact opposite – because positivity is more my style and I have seen better results. People learn better when focused on something positive rather than negative (I learned that from my years studying instructive design and then applying that to real-life scenarios with men I teach). So while teaching men how to avoid needy behavior is effective (and a method I still use when necessary), I find teaching men this positive trait is even more effective at combating neediness and helping them reach the goal of becoming a romantic hero.

THE AMAZING POSITIVE TRAIT

This behavior and resulting positive trait is easy to integrate into a man’s personality, yet many Christian “dating experts” never mention it! But believe me, women can’t stop thinking about a man who does it. It immediately sets the man apart from the rest of the average guys, and she instantly becomes intrigued. If there is one thing that drives women crazy, it’s this positive trait – and it has brought my small group of students amazing results. Interestingly it’s the same reason why men enjoy competitive endeavors such as: hunting, sports, career, and intellectual exercise like puzzles, video games, chess, and math. Why do men enjoy such activities? Because they’re a challenge (pat yourself on the back if you guessed being a challenge is the special trait/behavior). Would you enjoy playing Tetris if you could beat the game in with little to no effort? (meaning it’s not challenging) No. It’s not challenging enough. That’s why it’s so addicting for men to compete. It’s challenging and speaks to their masculine nature.

If Tetris is too easy to beat, it loses it's luster. Women view men the same way. If a man is not a challenge, then the woman loses interest in him, and moves on.

Women are attracted to men who are a challenge, because it speaks to their feminine nature. Human beings value what they have to work for. Earning a diploma or award is much more gratifying than being handed one for doing absolutely nothing. A woman who earns your attention will value your attention more. Women are naturally emotional and “lovers”. They long to love and be loved. A man who’s love she has to earn, is not only challenging and fun, but it directly speaks to her core nature the way God designed her. Ask one of your lady friends why challenging men are so attractive and you’ll get an interesting perspective. Why do you think women “play hard to get” so often? Becuase they know being challenging is far more attractive than being available. Being available is the consequence of being needy. The romantic hero is always a challenge.

BECOME CHALLENGING

Here are some things that a needy man does:

- tells a woman he is not in a serious relationship with, “I really like you” or “how he feels”
- calls/texts girls 100 times a day
- does favors for beautiful women that he doesn’t do for average women
- goes out of his way to do favors for women he is not romantically involved with
- is polite and apologetic in all his interactions with beautiful women
- puts beautiful, quality Christian women up an a pedastal (this is near idoltery)
- takes women out on typical dates like “dinner and a movie”

Here are some things that a challenging man does:

- treats beautiful and average girls the same
- treats beautiful women like friends
- has a “you scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours” relationship with women
- says “No” to a beautiful woman
- teases beautiful women like he would tease a little sister
- takes women on fun and interesting dates that he enjoys
- has things going for him other than her
- is a little mysterious and intriguing
- doesn’t reveal everything in the early stages of a relationship
- makes the woman earn his interest, rather than just giving it to her because she is attractive
- gives a little, and expects a little back. When he gives a lot, he expects a lot back.

I have often heard women describe men that they are obsessed with like this, “I don’t know what it is about him. He’s different. He’s challenging.” That’s how you want the woman of your dreams to describe you in the early stages of a relationship.

Future posts will go over why men behave needy towards beautiful women and how to change that behavior. You will learn how to become challenging from your core so it is expressed naturally in your outer interactions. There isn’t a major shift in your personality that needs to happen. Just a few tweaks here and there. I have a great method for learning how to be a challenge that will get the woman of your dreams to instantly be intrigued and attracted to you.

Until then, focus on being aware of when you are being needy. And better yet, challenge yourself to be more challenging in your social interactions, and especially with a woman you are romantically interested in.

As always feel free to email me any questions, comments or concerns. I want you to understand this stuff because I know if you do, you will be the romantic hero for that special girl.

markrose3030@gmail.com

Putting your best foot forward is always the best approach in life. Wouldn’t you agree?

That’s why these 7 tips are important to remember next time you’re with a high quality woman. In fact, this advice should be incorporated into your entire life! That’s how important, productive, and successful it is. Whether it’s your boss at work, your subordinate at work, or the grocery store clerk – everyone you interact with will appreciate these 7 traits, especially a woman you are romantically interested in.

These 7 traits communicate confidence that a romantic hero would have in one of those romance novels that women read. The best part? They’re easy to learn and apply!

Before we get to the tips, internalize one thing:

Communication is the defining factor in any relationship. Especially a romantic relationship. Women are social creatures that are extremely keen on interpreting communication. If you communicate well, you will have much greater success in your romantic relationships.

That’s what the 7 traits are about. Communicating to a woman like you never have before. Do you know scientists and scholars (Christian and secular) agree that communication is 60% Body Language, 30% Tonality (how you say things), and only 10% Words (what you say).

That means 90% of what you are communicating to a woman is not the words that come out of your mouth! That is an astounding fact with loads of implications (which you will learn about in the 7 traits). I was amazed and later thrilled when I heard that fact because I realized that I too could become a man that women looked at as a romantic hero. I just needed to understand and integrate the 7 traits into my life.

Let’s proceed.

BODY LANGUAGE

1. Posture is not just something your mom used to nag you about. A man with great posture communicates several things. Proper posture communicates  a man is healthy and takes care of himself. That means he respects his body. And if he respects his body, a woman interprets that as him respecting other things in his life. It’s a sign that he has self-respect – meaning confidence and high self-esteem. Every healthy Christian woman wants her man (or potential man) to have high self-esteem and solid confidence. In fact, beautiful high self-esteem women do not date men that have low self-esteem because they don’t respect themselves, so how could they respect her?

Confidence and self-esteem are not just related to a man’s health and self-respect. Posture also communicates status. Only high-status men walk with their shoulders back, chin up, and a pep in their step. This is the sort of confidence that a woman can feel comfortable around. A man who doesn’t look for trouble, but looks like he’d be trouble if you crossed him – but also a man that is positive and comfortable around people. A man with great posture looks like a leader, a dominant man, and a man sure of his actions.

If you do not have stellar posture, learn it and integrate it into your life now. Here is a quick, easy, and effective tip:

Stand with your back against a wall. Your heels, back of your legs, butt, back, shoulders and head should all be touching the wall. Arms resting comfortably at your side. Check to make sure all of the body parts listed are touching the wall.

How did it feel? Weird? Unlike yourself?

It will feel odd and out of character to carry yourself with correct posture at first. Do it anyway. In fact, it will feel odd to do any of these behaviors if you have never done them before. And that’s perfectly normal. That’s how every man feels when he learns something new. It’s something that comes with the territory if you want to be a romantic hero.

Remember to keep this posture throughout your entire day. And always check it in mirrors, windows, etc. I continue to check my posture as a habit so that I keep myself in check.

Men will notice and respect you more. Women will feel your presence and find you more attractive. More importantly, you will feel better about yourself and you will be expressing that in your posture.

As an aside, feeling good about yourself is also a great way to glorify God. When you live a life according to God’s commands, you are living a joyous and successful life. Your posture should communicate that.

2. Eye contact makes people feel like they have your attention. Whenever talking with a woman you are romantically interested in, you should be looking into her eyes. As a general rule, meaning ‘guidelines’ and not commandments, you should be looking into her eyes 60-80% of the time when telling a story, explaining something long, etc., otherwise you come off as too intense. Compliments, “thank you’s”, and questions should always be spoken with you looking into her eyes. Compliments should always be given with strong eye contact! Looking from your right eye to her right eye is a nice balance of making a connection without staring.

Refrain from looking down. Looking down communicates being uncomfortable and is low status. For example, slaves used to not be able to look royalty in the eye, so they looked down. Nowadays, everyone is equal and everyone is “allowed” to look people in the eye. It’s a matter of whether you respect yourself enough to give yourself permission.

3. Emoting is expressing an emotion with your body language and/or facial expressions. Women are highly emotional and you will communicate better with women if you can emote well. Start making facial expressions when talking. Was it an exciting ride on the way to work because you were late, had breakfast in one hand, and were driving 90mph? Express that in your face! Make hand gestures! etc.

Charismatic people are able to make their audience feel what they themselves are feeling. Emoting with your facial expressions and body language helps communicate what you are feeling. Women are highly sensitive to picking up on this subtle trait.

4. Your movements should appear calculated and purposeful. Think James Bond. You want to be smooth and direct. Not spastic and clumsy. There is a reason why James Bond is attractive to women, and part of that is his smooth swagger. Women want a directed man, not a clumsy boy.

Your walk should be like that of a gunslinger – a little bit of bounce in your step, sway in your arms, and twist in your hips. Take up space and move with confidence. When walking down a sidewalk and another person is walking in the opposite direction, do you move completely out of the way for them? You shouldn’t. Each of you splits the sidewalk so that there is an even pathway for both. That shows you both respect yourself, and the other person. Note: if there is a reason to give the person the entire sidewalk (injured, obese, carrying children, etc.), do so.

Women appreciate a man who is purposeful in his movements. It shows he is thoughtful, confident, and under control. All qualities that women enjoy their man having.

TONALITY

I didn’t think it was important to consider how words sounded when they came out of my mouth. It wasn’t until I read several books that I was convinced it is an important social trait. And scientist have proved, 30% of human communication is in tonality. That’s why men with deep, loud voices are automatically looked at as alpha, leaders, and respected men. Women often describe a man with a deep voice as sexy.

5. Speak in a calm and deep voice. If you have a high-pitched voice, fine. But many men talk from their throats. Talk from your belly. And speak slowly and coherently so that others can hear you. Again, it shows confidence and self-respect when a woman experiences a man who takes the time to speak clearly and with meaning.

6. Project your voice! This one sounds like it might be unimportant. But it is one of the most important tips. If people can’t hear you, you need to speak louder. If a woman says, “what?” or “I can’t hear you,” then you are failing in communicating with her. She is basically saying, “You are speaking like a timid boy. Can you speak like a confident man, please.”

‘Nuff said about projection. Just do it.

WHAT YOU SAY

Your words are only ten percent of your total communication, but this next tip was so important that I wanted to include it.

7. Make more statements and ask less questions. Questions are value seeking. “What do you do? Where are you from? What kind of salad are you going to get? Do you like my shoes?” Some questions are okay, and appropriate in the correct context. But most men ask too many questions of a woman they are romantically interested in. And they are usually the same boring questions.

Instead of asking “what do you do?”, say, “You look like the professional type,” or “You remind me of a school teacher.”

Women are annoyed by average guys asking average questions. A man that makes statements is more fun and again, shows confidence. A man that asks average boring questions is thought to be average and boring. Average and boring is highly unattractive to beautiful, high quality women.

Attractive women get asked boring questions by boring guys all the time.

SUMMARY

If you haven’t noticed the pattern already, you should know that all of these 7 traits are about communicating confidence in one way or another. Women respond to these traits because they know a man who displays all seven, is a man worthy of romantic relationship. Of course, there is more to dating, courtship, and romance than just those 7 traits, but you have a huge advantage now that you know what to do and how to do it.

The ideal Romantic Hero is a man who displays the 7 traits in all he does. He makes a conscious effort to improve himself, so that he is continually adding to his value as a Christian man. He knows that in order to successfully build romance with a high quality woman, his confidence must be rock solid and his communication will have to be effortless – and the only way to reach those high standards is to practice everyday.

Here is your plan of action: one day a week, focus on each of those traits. Make sure you are diligent. Make a list or put a reminder on your phone if you have to. If you keep it in your mind to develop these traits, you will see improvement. Three times a day remind yourself to keep up your trait. If the trait is posture, make sure you walk around your house with the correct posture. If it is eye contact, make sure you hold eye contact with everyone you speak to. I have found that it works best for me when I remind myself at breakfast, lunch, and dinner – those are good times to take a minute to think about the trait and how you can incorporate it into your day.

One trait a day. Seven days a week. In one month, you will have amazing results.

Congratulations, you are on your way to becoming a Romantic Hero!

This article was rather long, but it was important for you to understand these traits. If you have questions, concerns, or just need some support, prayer or advice, don’t hesitate to email me: MarkRose3030@gmail.com